Football quiz.

1. What do you eat whilst watching football ?
a. Munchies in front of the TV.
b. A pie from the kiosk in the ground.
c. A prawn sandwich.

2. How far do you live from the ground ?
a. I used to live in a nearby town, but I’ve moved.
b. I bought a house on the same street as the stadium.
c. I live in Pnom Penn.

3. Do you have a replica shirt ?
a. I was bought the 1990 away shirt as a present.
b. I buy the new home shirt every other season.
c. My wardrobe contains 48 replica shirts since 2005.

4. Your club directors piss you off, do you ?
a. Write a why oh why letter to the BBC.
b. Carry on regardless, it’s the club you love not its staff.
c. Spit out your dummy and form a new club.

5. Why do you support your team ?
a. It was the closest ground to my home.
b. My father, my grandfather and all my family support them.
c. I was looking for another team after Liverpool went shit.

6. Other fans invade your forum, do you ?
a. Log off and have a cup of tea.
b. Give as good as you get with your vast knowledge and wit.
c. Shut the site down and go and tell your mum.

7. What do you think of opposition players ?
a. I don’t know about them, as long as we win I’m happy.
b. I check opta before each game to see who the danger men are.
c. Anyone who doesn’t play for us is shit.

8. You get a free ticket to see your team, do you ?
a. Give it to one of your mates, he would appreciate it more.
b. Offer it to a fellow fan on the forum, you have a season ticket.
c. Sell it on eBay, it’s too far to travel from Singapore.

9. How much do you read about your club ?
a. The Observer sport pages on a Sunday morning.
b. I have a library, I even read past player autobiographies.
c. Janet and John go shopping, then I’m on free reading.

Check your result:

Mostly A’s:
You’re an armchair fan, it’s a while since you went to the ground but you at least you could find it if need be. You might not spend time and money on following your team, but you love your club. Well done.

Mostly B’s:
Congratulations, you’re a proper bone-fide fan. You follow your team through thick and thin, rain or shine. You are the one everyone else phones to answer the quiz questions. You’ll probably have your ashes scattered on the pitch.

Mostly C’s:
You’re a rag ! Your team play in a swamp just outside Manchester. You’ve never been to a game in your life and the only reason you support them is because your mates do. The fact that Cornwall has no premier league teams isn’t a proper excuse.