Bluetealeaf

2012-01-17T18:42:00.000Z

They fill my cup up in the cage.

Every night I watch the news and every night I shake my head at the new depths that are plumbed by the feckless hoard at Westminster, they who purport to have our best interests at heart. The news this week that Michael Gove thinks we should buy the queen a new boat in a year that has seen cuts that would make Draco himself suck air through his teeth, just illustrates what complete fucking cretins these people are. But why am I surprised? The news is the same now as it was in the bad old days of Thatcher with the miners’s strike and the poll tax riots. Do we succumb to a kind of political amnesia? Maybe it’s just apathy. Whatever the reason we seem to keep putting up with a continuous shower of shite, sometimes we even ask for a sponge. Dead soldiers are still being brought home from a conflict designed wholly to ensure oil companies keep pumping, big business avoids tax of sums that would solve our current financial crisis while the government seem happy to take money from disabled people. The list of injustice carried out in our name gets bigger by the day, when will we decide we’ve had enough? When will we find our line and know that it has been crossed? Maybe when the turkey twirlers run out, till then we’ll just plug ourselves into a reality TV show and presume that someone else will fight the cause for us.

What happened? Is there no hope? Maybe the ants will look after the planet better, it shouldn’t be that long till they get their turn.

2011-12-02T21:25:00.004Z

Some clarity.

I thought I should make my position clear. You see, the term atheist is quite a combative word, it makes a statement and puts people on the defensive from the outset. To me, the term atheist says “I don’t believe in god and I think anyone that does is a cretin”. This couldn’t be further from the truth, I don’t have a problem with people who believe in god, even the ones who stand on a box in the town centre, berating me for my sins, and assuring me that I will spend an eternity in a fiery realm paying for them. You see, at least the weekend evangelists berate me because they care. My issue is with organised religion, and the control freaks that pretend to care but really just want to protect their interests. These people incur my wrath frequently.

My hatred of organised religion isn’t why I don’t believe in god though, despite the pain and suffering that they cause around the world… and I’m not picking on any one of them in particular, they would all have questions to answer if they ever met their god, and I sometimes think it would be poetic if the Westborough Baptists actually had to stand before a deity and explain their disgraceful conduct, that’s a rapture I would buy tickets for.

I can no more say to a believer that god doesn’t exist as they can say to me god does. My complete and utter refusal to accept that there is a supreme being is based on empirical scientific evidence, or the complete lack of it. Are we to believe that an omniscient being monitors our petitions and alters the universe accordingly? The circumstantial evidence is manifold, from miracles to faces appearing in tortillas, but there has never been a single shred of testable evidence that a god has ever existed. In my opinion, when Darwin published origin of the species, we, as a species, should have collectively face-palmed and got on with creating an egalitarian secular society, bent on scientific advancement and ending want. But we didn’t, so here I am.

I am quite content with idea that I won’t be reborn, that my death will be the end. I love the fact that every atom in my body came from the centre of a star, and that every atom in my body will one day return to space to become another star. The irony of that vision of eternal life isn’t lost on me by the way, I just love the fact that one day in some far distant future atoms that may have been me or you will meet in the vast emptiness of interstellar space, or the fiery furnace of a star’s core… scary how close to reality the fairy stories are really isn’t it? It’s just the god bit that’s the problem.

I’m going to leave you with the words of an inspirational man…

I'm gonna share with you a vision that I had, cause I love you. And you feel it. You know all that money we spend on nuclear weapons and defence each year, trillions of dollars, correct? Instead -- just play with this -- if we spent that money feeding and clothing the poor of the world -- and it would pay for it many times over, not one human being excluded -- we can explore space together, both inner and outer, forever in peace.

2011-11-25T23:05:00.004Z

Football quiz.

1. What do you eat whilst watching football ?
a. Munchies in front of the TV.
b. A pie from the kiosk in the ground.
c. A prawn sandwich.

2. How far do you live from the ground ?
a. I used to live in a nearby town, but I’ve moved.
b. I bought a house on the same street as the stadium.
c. I live in Pnom Penn.

3. Do you have a replica shirt ?
a. I was bought the 1990 away shirt as a present.
b. I buy the new home shirt every other season.
c. My wardrobe contains 48 replica shirts since 2005.

4. Your club directors piss you off, do you ?
a. Write a why oh why letter to the BBC.
b. Carry on regardless, it’s the club you love not its staff.
c. Spit out your dummy and form a new club.

5. Why do you support your team ?
a. It was the closest ground to my home.
b. My father, my grandfather and all my family support them.
c. I was looking for another team after Liverpool went shit.

6. Other fans invade your forum, do you ?
a. Log off and have a cup of tea.
b. Give as good as you get with your vast knowledge and wit.
c. Shut the site down and go and tell your mum.

7. What do you think of opposition players ?
a. I don’t know about them, as long as we win I’m happy.
b. I check opta before each game to see who the danger men are.
c. Anyone who doesn’t play for us is shit.

8. You get a free ticket to see your team, do you ?
a. Give it to one of your mates, he would appreciate it more.
b. Offer it to a fellow fan on the forum, you have a season ticket.
c. Sell it on eBay, it’s too far to travel from Singapore.

9. How much do you read about your club ?
a. The Observer sport pages on a Sunday morning.
b. I have a library, I even read past player autobiographies.
c. Janet and John go shopping, then I’m on free reading.

Check your result:

Mostly A’s:
You’re an armchair fan, it’s a while since you went to the ground but you at least you could find it if need be. You might not spend time and money on following your team, but you love your club. Well done.

Mostly B’s:
Congratulations, you’re a proper bone-fide fan. You follow your team through thick and thin, rain or shine. You are the one everyone else phones to answer the quiz questions. You’ll probably have your ashes scattered on the pitch.

Mostly C’s:
You’re a rag ! Your team play in a swamp just outside Manchester. You’ve never been to a game in your life and the only reason you support them is because your mates do. The fact that Cornwall has no premier league teams isn’t a proper excuse.

2011-05-29T18:08:00.001+01:00

I feel as though you ought to know….

Work and other more pressing matters have kept me from here lately. I intend to finish the 30 song challenge, and carry on posting.

Before that happens I have more work and a week’s holiday, but hopefully both of those things will give me something to write about.

2011-05-07T18:12:00.001+01:00

New songs and blue songs #26

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument - Happy Mondays - Step on.

2011-05-06T15:03:00.001+01:00

New songs and blue songs #25

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 25 - a song that makes you laugh - Tim Minchin - Prejudice.

2011-05-05T20:21:00.001+01:00

New songs and blue songs #24

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral - Elvis Presley - Way down.

2011-05-02T20:54:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #23

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding - The Cufflinks - Tracy.

Just because....

2011-05-01T12:24:00.000+01:00

New songs and blue songs #22

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad - The Beatles - She loves you.

I could have picked any Beatles song, pre '64. Happy days.

... and with a love like that you know you should be glad...

2011-04-30T00:33:00.003+01:00

Tell me, what is my life without your love...

I’ve probably covered this here and here.

But, it’s worth mentioning again. 28 years today I married my sweetheart.

2011-04-29T17:05:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #21

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy - Rammstein - Du hast.

Wollen Sie einander lieben und achten und die Treue halten bis dass der Tod euch scheidet?

du hast mich gefragt, und ich hab nichts gesagt

2011-04-25T15:06:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #20

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry - B52s - Love shack.

How can anyone fail to be lifted by this song, it puts a smile on my face and gets me tapping the steering wheel. This song should be mandatory for anyone with road rage, stress or depression. Click the link, crank the volume, sit back and let the big blue wave of music wash all the crap away.

Hop in my Chrysler, it's as big as a whale and it's about to set sail!

2011-04-24T22:53:00.001+01:00

Pools of sorrow, waves of joy...

Just so you know…. The resurrection of Jesus was a sham, a politically motivated magic act designed to give the Jews their king and keep Rome happy. Oh, and god doesn’t exist anyway, heaven is just an illusion, invented by those who would control us, believed by those of us afraid of death. When we die there is nothing but an unending night, an eternal and infinite blackness, our atoms will be one with the universe for ever.

This post was brought to you by the combined effects of sloe rum, whisky and beer.

2011-04-24T21:29:00.003+01:00

New songs and blue songs #19

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 19 - a song from your favoUrite album - The Stone Roses - Ten storey love song.

This is only my favourite album on hot sunny days like today....

There's no sure fire set solution, no short cut through the trees.

2011-04-23T14:59:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #18

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio - Pulp - Babies.

Great track, it reminds me of the 90s. Camping trips in an old VW camper van, Lamot pils, black cord carpets and black ash furniture, MTV being decent, German channels on Sky, Max Headroom, deciding whether to go for CD or stick with vinyl, walking to work, having a garden, not paying the poll tax, the school run, working nights, making ends meet.

It's funny how all the things I can remember are pretty superficial, not much depth to those memories.... maybe too much booze? Anyway, Pulp were great, this track was brilliant. Enjoy.

Well it happened years ago.....

2011-04-22T11:35:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #17

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio - Sammy Davis jnr - The candyman.

This just seems to be on a lot lately, maybe coincidence but I'm not sure. It's a happy song anyway, so enjoy.

Separate the sorrow and collect up all the cream.

2011-04-21T15:19:00.000+01:00

New songs and blue songs #16

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate - Shed 7 - Going for gold.

I'm not sure why I liked this group, maybe I was earching for something after the Stone Roses split. I didn't find it here, and every time I hear it now I turn it off.

You took the shine right out of my smile....

2011-04-20T00:02:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #15

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 15 - a song that describes you - Devine comedy - Gin soaked boy.

Ok, I was going to go with The Smiths - Handsome devil, but I opted for self-deprecation instead. I love the lyrics to this song, very clever indeed. You don't hear enough of this group in my opinion. I'm not sure whether the song is a reference to Tom Waits song of the same name or not, I couldn’t find any information on what the song is about. This is a good thing I think, the truth would only spoil the illusion.

Here’s the Tom Waits version in case you were curious.

I’m the will you’ll not destroy, I’m the gin in the gin soaked boy

2011-04-19T22:32:00.001+01:00

It's so lonesome by night and by day...

So, the reason we were in Melton Mowbray last week can now be revealed. I was at the headquarters of a company that has just given me a rather large contract with the makers of a very well-known international brand. I’m going to be on their site somewhere in the North West of England for three days a week till December. I will be teaching them things and hopefully they will be better for it.

This should be rich pickings for a blogger so watch this space. No names obviously, I want to keep the contract and stay out of the courts.

I’ve just got Rage against the machine’s discography, so I have plenty to listen to while I’m away.

2011-04-19T12:34:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #14

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love - Brook Benton - Fools rush in.

This song reminds me of growing up. The record player was in the living room and I had to take my turn. In between my grandmother playing Joseph Locke and Harry Secombe, my dad would play Ray Charles, Jim Reeves, some awful country music... and, a 20 greatest hits of Brook Benton. I loved every track, but this one has stayed with me and is never very far away from a playlist.

I have heard lots of versions of this track, but none comes close in my opinion, Mr Benton had a very distinctive voice, and this track is just brilliant.

When we met, I felt my life begin, so open up your heart and let this fool rush in...

2011-04-18T20:39:00.002+01:00

New songs and blue songs #13

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure - Will Young - All time love .

I can't abide the whole pop idle, x factor style shows, so consequently don't have a lot of time for those who "win". Although I think the only winner is the bloke that owns the rights to the show. However, I do appreciate good music, and this young man can sing. I'm not a fan of his because I don't think he has chosen the right music to compliment his voice yet... but hey, music is subjective.

This song is perfect though, he sings it well and I can listen to it any time it comes on the radio.

Some days you're too set in your ways...

2011-04-18T20:23:00.002+01:00

The truth is in what you see - not what you read...

So I was mooching in my referrer stats and found this. I have a mention in the New York Times.

Ok, so it’s probably just an RSS feed, but I’ll take those where I can. I have now been reviewed in the Guardian and Web User, banned in China and have the NY Times on my referrer stats.

Nice.

2011-04-17T17:12:00.001+01:00

Modern Yoga for blokes #1

The Mantis.

Find a comfortable position, it doesn’t have to be the lotus. Reach out both arms and grasp the spam and egg butty with both hands. Stuff in gob. Repeat till you’re full, the butties are all gone, or your arms get tired.

Next in this award winning series… The big dipper.

2011-04-17T00:22:00.001+01:00

New songs and blue songs #12

The 30 day song challenge.

Day 12 - a song from a band you hate - Arctic Monkeys - Dancing Shoes.

I don't know why I don't like them, they've done nothing wrong. They write catchy hooks, clever lyrics and seem pretty good live. As with most thing s first impressions counted, I decided quite quickly that they weren't for me. It could be that he sings with an accent, I can't put my finger on it. I just don't like them. Hate is maybe a strong word, I dislike them a lot. I do listen to music that I don't like, it's called radio. This group don't get that much airplay thankfully, but when they do it's either this one or Mardy bum, and that one does make me laugh, so dancing shoes is probably my pet hate at the moment. I suppose this song celebrates the diversity of music, they've done nothing wrong but I still don't like them.

Don't act like it's not happening.

2011-04-16T23:35:00.001+01:00

You heard me saying a prayer for...

Ok, my throat was sore from shouting at the telly during the fantastic match this evening. City are in a cup final for the first time since 1981. That day I had sneaked into to Hyde United whilst Paul Power scored an amazing injury time free kick to get us to a Wembley final against Spurs. Today Yaya Toure scored through Van Der Sar’s legs to set up a final against Bolton or Stoke.

So, I went downstairs for my cigar with a full moon looking down on me, and as the clouds scudded across its face, it seemed as blue as I’ve ever seen it. Anyway, the smoke and the drink. I opted for a Guantanamera decimos and a Jura superstition. The cigars are machine made and a bit rough around the edges, still a nice 40 minute smoke though. I think the delicate smoke and sweetness in the Jura was overwhelmed, I should have chosen something with a bigger taste, the cigar’s last third killed the drink completely. Maybe the big smoke of the Laphroaig quarter cask would have stood up to it. It wasn’t spoiled though, the night and the memories of today made it an excellent smoke.

Now I have to get ready for the 14th of May, it will be a year and seven days since my dad died, and when they sing abide with me I’m not sure I’ll be able to hold it together. For now, just getting there is good enough. Thank you Blues.