Saturday, March 05, 2005  

How shall I fill....

We have a new room under the stairs, the question is, what the fuck am I going to do with it ?

Tracy suggested a panic room. I suppose if anyone ever broke into our house whilst we were in they would need somewhere to hide. The site of me, bollock naked, weilding a pickaxe handle and screaming at the top of my lungs, would be enough to scare anyone. No, breaking into my house should be something no one would forget in a hurry. Not a panic room then.

A server room, this would maybe tidy up all the wires and general computer parts from the living room. But then I wouldn't have anyone to talk to while I fuck about on t'internet. Not a server room then.

A secret distillery. I could make my own moonshine, it's warm enough under there. I was banned from making home brew after the fiasco with the double fermented wine. That was about fifteen years ago, I wonder if the ban has been lifted yet. Maybe not a good idea, access to that much free booze would probably kill me. Not a distillery then.

An indoor shed. Living on the third floor I thought I would never own that bastion of maleness, a shed. A bolt hole would be nice, well sitting on the toilet for hours on end gives you piles apparently. I could fit in a couple of old squishy chairs and a small drinks cabinet. I could maybe set up a series of cameras around the flats, and watch people as they go about their daily lives. Maybe not.

An extra cupboard. You just know it's going to end up full of boxes of crap, an adventure playground for spiders and a repository for the European dust mountain. As always, when you utilise spaces like this for storing boxes of stuff, when you want something it's right at the fucking back under everything else. Not a cupboard then.

So far the indoor shed is winning, unless you have a suggestion.

| posted by Simon | 6:44 pm | 0 comments
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