Saturday, February 07, 2004  

Sisters are doin’ it for themselves.

Why do Pink Beyonce and Brittney need to prostitute themselves for a soft drink company ? Haven’t these three overrated bints got enough fucking cash ? You would think that somewhere at the back of their minds would be a shred of artistic integrity, but no, the almighty dollar wins through every fucking time. I suppose it’s fitting that these three media whores were chosen to stand partially clad in gladiatorial dress hawking soft drinks to a generation of over weight, under educated, future consumers. Their work is the musical equivalent of Pepsi. Sickly, full of froth and ultimately disposable.

Another thing, who sold them the rights to “we will rock you” ? It’s a fuckin’ travesty. Greed has got to be one of the most despicable of human traits, what makes you rich celebrities sell yourselves. ? You have enough cash, quit and give someone else a chance you greedy fucks. At least then we may get some original adverts, funny or well thought out. Not “I know, we get Pink Beyonce and Brittney to dress up in skimpy outfits, put a nice heavy beat in there, fuck me we could sell anything.”

We will, we will rock you. Drink Cola.
We will, we will rock you. Eat burgers.
We will, we will rock you. The war was justified.
We will, we will rock you. Smoke cigarettes.
We will, we will rock you. If you’re not with us, you’re against us.
We will, we will rock you. Eat burgers.
We will, we will rock you. Drink cola.

“Mummy, what did you do when I was a little girl ?”

“Well sweetheart, I sold my body to strangers to pay our rent and put food on the table, there was no work because all the companies had moved to the Far East. It was cheaper. I couldn’t afford to go to college and get a decent education. After your daddy died in the war we had no money, so I went on the game. I used to lie there while men used my body for their carnal pleasure, gave me cash then went home to their families.”

“Gee mom, you were a whore, I bet you wished you had been beautiful and talented like Brittney or Beyonce and achieved the American dream.”

“Yes sweetheart, that’s right, I’m such a shit mother.”

| posted by Simon | 11:33 pm | 0 comments
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