Irrational fears.

Anyone who has read my 100 things section will know that I’m scared of Moths and Dentists. If ever there was a good reason to outlaw genetic engineering, it’s the thought that someone somewhere could breed a Moth with a penchant for dentistry.

These genetic tinkerers could be responsible for all manner of chimera, from the Marmoset motor mechanic, or grease monkey…. To the Gerbil hostage negotiator, or Dave, as he's known to his mates down the legion.

Any more ?

The rest of this post has been chased from my mind by the image of a six foot moth leering over me with a drill in each of its six hairy claws, an inadequate strip of cloth covering its gaping fang-filled maw. It screeches in a language I somehow understand “Open wide, this won’t hurt a bit”. All through this nightmare its fetid wings buzz and flutter, sending motes of dust into the air, reflecting in its compound eyes like mandelbrots. Strapped into my chair, I am unable to escape its hairy evil intentions. I always thought they wanted to get into my mouth.

OPEN WIDE !

You know I’m not going to sleep, bastards !