Do you remember,

Last year when we had a car crash ? The feckless scumbag did a runner because he was pissed and driving a car with no insurance. The police later caught up with the cowardly shithead and nicked him. Because the fucking arsehole had no insurance I had to cough up my excess and lose my no-claims. I have just had a letter from my solicitor on behalf of the MIB (no not the men in black) the motor insurance bureau, asking how we found the name and address of the lowlife cunt who ran into us. Now that may seem like a reasonable question, except we told them almost twelve months ago exactly how we came by this information. So why are they asking you again, I hear you cry……..Because they are fucking stupid, incompetent, timewasting, twatheaded, muppet fuckers wallowing in their own fuckwittery !

So, when you buy your next car don’t bother insuring it, and don’t bother observing the drink drive laws. Just do what the fuck you want and the other poor twat will foot the bill.